I Am

There’s an assignment that all of my kids have done in school now. As I see it, what I’m about to show you is hanging on the wall in Matthew’s classroom…so I’m not blowing any secrets here.

I don’t save much, but I have saved each one of these. Matthew was asked to do this in 6th grade Language Arts, my others did this exercise in 2nd grade at St. Anthony’s in Fresno with the simply amazing Mrs. Gennock.  With every year of our life, if we choose, we have the ability to grow our own awareness of ourselves and our environment, and I love this assignment because it gives me a little more insight on his inner workings. So here it is, with my response bullet pointed below his words in bold. 

I am tall and hardworking.  

  • True and both such good things. Height carries status that I will train you to feel worthy of. Stand tall and be proud. The best thing that comes from hard work is the confidence you build in yourself.  No comparisons, just commit to your process and your hard work will lead you where you are supposed to go. 


I wonder what I will be when I grow up

  • You are looking for where your passion and talents lie.  Don’t be afraid to try and fail, it helps us check things off the list that weren’t meant for us, and we build strength through the process of trial and error. I promise I will continue to nurture your interests and guide you on the path to find your calling.

I hear my mom encouraging me

  • I’m glad you do Bubs, it comes naturally to me, and it’s a gift to be here to guide you.  My greatest hope is that you believe me and use my encouragement to know what you are capable of on your own. 

I see an amazing beach

  • You are so blessed to live where you do.  It’s a dream, don’t take it for granted. Get into that ocean every chance you get.  Nothing calms the mind better than the water.

I want to be a pro surfer

  • Don’t be afraid to set goals, but know that the action plan to attain them falls on you.  I can support you, but in the end, it’s your action that will make your dreams come true.

I am tall, smart

  • You will be the tallest in our family. No small feat and pretty cool. Don’t be afraid to take up that space. You are smart, but more importantly, you are wise.  Wise comes with intuition, with allowing what you take in to move, mold, and change you. Keep doing that, don’t play it safe when it comes to feeling things.  Acknowledge and express, that’s the smartest thing you can do.

I pretend to be the pro surfer of the world

  • Visualize. It’s so powerful and helps create a space to belong in your grandest vision. Use your imagination to create your reality. Sink into it and believe, then back it up with your game plan.

I feel worried when I do something wrong

  • Oh Bubs, I’m sorry, I think you got this one from me. I get it, but I’ve learned. Shift your focus to what you do right, focus on your “enoughness”. As long as we learn and survive them, there are no mistakes.  Don’t let the guilt or shame take over and rob you of the energy you need to grow. We are made of so much goodness, it’s only when we fail to reflect do we miss what a mistake was supposed to teach us. 

I worry when I get bad grades

  • Work hard and don’t quit.  The rest will figure itself out. Sometimes we don’t bloom the first place we are planted, but if we are smart, like you are, we figure out why. And there are so many ways to measure what we learn, grades are just one of them.

I cry when I do something wrong.

  • My biggest goal is to help you feel safe in this world. It’s the basis of all learning and connection, things I want you to experience that make life beautiful. When you don’t feel safe, it’s hard to regulate your emotions, that’s why I try to teach you to breath and slow down…then those impulses won’t jump up on you the way they sometimes do.

I am tall and hardworking

  • Stand tall and work to connect. I know it’s hard, I know people can be unkind but your intuition is nails and always tells you when it’s worth it, so trust that.  The best people take the time to understand, and it only takes a few to form the tightest circle.  You already have that with your family and you get to choose who gets in from there. 

I understand my parents well

  • I’m sure you do. You are a mystical creature and far more observant that most people notice. Always use your understanding to find compassion for difficult situations, but let me help you build the boundaries so that you know what to give energy to, and when it is best to just let go.

I say I dream that my mom and dad will get along

  • Don’t worry Bubs, you are not responsible, and I am just choosing my energy.  What you interpret as conflict, is just me knowing how to fill myself up so that real healing takes place. Surround yourself with what fills you up, live inspired, not obligated, and your energy will not fall short.  Then you can inspire, forgive, and help others from a place of abundance.

I dream that I will do something amazing one day.

  • You don’t recognize yet that you do amazing things every day. You tackle things that scare you and have learned to breathe through the overwhelm that life can bring.  You have gone from the bottom of the pool to surfing in the Pacific Ocean. You are a miracle.

I try to do my best in school.

  • And your teachers see it every day. It is the thread that runs through every conversation I have with any of your them. Work hard, don’t compare yourself. Remember we all have different brains and yours is beautiful. 

I hope I get really famous one day.

  • Follow your heart and you’ll be famous with the right people. That’s all that matters in the end.  Fame does not equal fulfillment or even happiness, just ask Elton John. Everyone wants acknowledgment at some point, I am here to give it to you.  Keep talking to me. 

I am tall, hardworking

  • Be proud of who you are and keep working.  The way we speak to ourselves defines our path.  Keep telling yourself, stand tall, work hard. Your life is going to be more than good. I understand you Bubs, and you inspire me.

My poem:

I am conscious and brave

I wonder how many days I get on this earth

I hear enlightened conversation 

I want to join in

I am conscious and brave

I pretend that I’m not scared

I feel optimistic

I worry that I don’t have enough time left to accomplish everything I want to do

I cry when I’m lonely

I am conscious and brave

I understand that nothing works unless I do

I say I belong

I dream that my kids will find their calling

I try to inspire

I hope to find the deepest form of connection

I am conscious and brave

Try it…send it to me.  Self awareness starts with the simplest acknowledgement and opens the door to life long learning.  It’s the real fountain of youth and we are here to learn and inspire each other with our truth.